Merry!

Ive been to the pub tonight, and had a shandy or 9...and im a bit merry.....to be fair i wasn't going to go, i couldn't be arsed and when i got there i was bored, but then i got drunk...i dont remember the middle bit! I also had a mixed grill! bonus.....me moms been shopping today as well and got me chocolate Philadelphia, which looks and sounds disgusting but i want to try it! Other than that ive had a boring day, involving things that really dont merit putting on this blog...i mean most things dont merit typing about haha!..... although i am excited because today i looked at my stats and i had 100 page views, and 3 were from Germany, Australia and Czech Republic....now i am an amateur blogger so to me thats worth jizzing over! but im sure most of you readers have 30,000 readers from Kathmandu! ...... well tomorrow i hope is is proper bo'selecta and i do summit radical like go reindeer riding with Mel Gibson! ..... peace people x

P.s just wanted to add that on the way home in the taxi, the driver said, do you want me to bust a left? (i presume it was quicker)...then my sisters boyfriends brothers (pissed up) said do you like busta rhymes?...to which my sisters boyfriend then said, do you like busta'me anus open?...i thought that was hilarious, cause im drunk...and then someone farted.

OUCH...!!!

Played football again today in-order to burn more calories!....although i had a pie when i got in....Well anyways, ive grazed my leg sliding on the astro turf and its killing me, so i decided to apply some Savlon Cream *THE BEST ANTI-SEPTIC CREAM MONEY CAN BUY* (hopefully they'll see ive put that and pay me for advertisement!....anyways, the story....basically ive looked in the medicine draw, didnt really pay much attention, whipped out the blue tube, squeezed it on my leg, rubbed it in and ...TITLE OF THIS POST, OUCH!......me being a moron, ive jus applied some Bonjela *BEST GEL FOR SORE GUMS AND MOUTH ULCERS MONEY CAN BUY* (same again)....well yee, Bonjela is kinda menthol flavoured and my leg is now on fire!...The End x

The Twitch

Just a little short blog update, just to basically say i have a very annoying twitch in my right arse cheek and its driving me mental!...i must be stressed, but im sure i have the adrenaline glands of a 120 year of turtle. I dont know but its driving me up the blood wall.....Anyhow as for today's plans....ermm, nothing! Tbf while im back in Telford this blog is about as action packed as the debating club at the mutes society. Anyhow, if anyone knows of a way to get rid of twitches, let me knoooowwwww traaaa x

Loving this at the momento!

Didnt actually realise the atrist was a man until i saw the video!...im loving this today, bit of a big jump from yesterdays Grillz by nelly!

Also the Virtual Barber shop is veryyyy cool!... bin aural technology...well summit like that! stick your headphones in, close your eyes! and you'll end up somewhere else!

Fat Arse

Playing football tonight, as im pretty much sure my blood flow is like the fat german kid stuck up the chocolate factory milkshake pipe at willy wonkas place...yesterday  had a large big tasty meal, large variety KFC meal and then a bacon sandwich....and today ive had a chicken royale meal...litteraly a right fat shit at the mo! but im treating myself after living off cuppa soups and noodles at uni!....soo yee off to footy to burn them calories!....also im pretty sure i lose and gain weight like that! *clicked me fingers*

Peace People

ADHD

My moms been in the kitchen 10 mins...ive made her a sausage sandwich and a cup of coffee, jus to shut her up! (i do love ya mother)...and now she's just accused me of having ADHD. She said i definitely  had it at school, and that's why i was a little tosser. Tbf now this might sound mental, but in years 8-10, i did have to drink a tbsp of white cider vinegar mixed with water (the doctor found it on the net) apparently is calmed ADHD kids down....i thought and knew it was a load of bollocks, but i got a free Nutri Grain bar off the school nurse, so i jus continued to act like a dick. That is all :)

Dogs give me a sore throat!

Hello there lovely people (that dont quite exist yet) and hello all those miserable shits! but that is your divine right to be miserable, so good on ya!..... Sleeping patterns a bit out of sync so ive just woke up! and the dog was on my chest, and i now have a sore throat, so im pretty sure ive breathed in his fur and given my self some sort of asthmatic throat rash!....On the plus side, i have just remembered i have some Rolo yougherts in the fridge! woo....they should cool me throat down! tasty!.....Football is on all day today, so im going to have to go round me mates now to watch it else me mum will purposely hoover around me to piss me off....plus she wants stuff putting in the loft and i cant be arsed so im escaping the household! So today i will be doing sweet F.A, but in a good way, because its a Sunday and its the one day i use a biblical reference in order to have a 'day of rest'....actually i use that for everyday of the week!.....if something wild and exciting happens though later, ill tell you because i do live on a council estate and there is always drama! peace out

Howdy dudes. Funny little life story to kick start my blogging!

Hello there interested and inquisitive people! My name is Josh Baker...Im currently studying Criminology at Liverpool's John Moores University....and i wont lie, i am a stereotypical student...i get drunk, i don't go to half my seminars and im in it for the party life!...im using this year to get it out my system, well so i tell myself haha!

Anyway, i jut want to blog about myself, like a sort of brief history of my life, and the type of character i believe i am! Hopefully then people will enjoy me for me, and my blogs and such like blaaaa....:)

Im currently living in Liverpool, although im in my Home town of Telford at the moment (proud of my dump)....due to the fact i have 1 Fray Bentos pie and half a loaf of stale bread at the flat, and the pies keep giving me heart burn! so ive popped back home so my mum will feed me real food...last month i ate noodles everyday for a week and it gave me depression. They were 11p ones as well, so when they say chicken flavour, they mean dust flavour.

Soo...me names josh, im from Telford, and currently a student...tbf this is where my blog starts....the journey to university. Since i was little, ive always been...ermm, a little shit, excuse the french. I got kicked out of school at 15 for a lil hand bags at dawn moment with my english teacher...then failed my GCSE's not surprisingly, although a positive did come out of this, as when i got my results the GCSE's spelt FUCCED, (F U maths and English) which my Science teacher Mrs Goddard did not find funny and pretty sure she said ''well im glad you find it funny, because your going nowhere in life''...im at uni, so jokes on you cow!... although i am still a drunken stereotypical one....but yeah, anyways, i failed the GCSE's, then got to New college, i semi kept my head down, did my NVQ and then got onto the A level course, again just about kept me head down, completed year one..and then as usual, went tits up and got kicked out, i think i didn't agree with the teacher an so ended up using some french on her!...sooo, i bummed around for months on end, me mom moaned her tits off at me, and then decided to get a job...worked, got paid, hated the job, loved me car....but that lil beauty wasnt enough to keep me going, and the constant same old shite and clock watching got to me, so instead of just handing in me notice, i just kinda fucked off and left!....sooo then i decided to go back to college and do a Diploma, which would land me a place at uni! and for once...i actually did it, went in everyday and enjoyed it....i'd finally grown up!.....sort of, but obviously now im at Liverpool uni, and the only reason i moved here was cause i heard it was a good night out haha! but that's just me as per usual!...

But yeah, ive been a little bugger! but the kinda of bugger than ya nan says ''ooohh leave him alone he's just having a laugh''....id also just like to mention in this incoherent rambling, that im the type of person that if you saw me in the street in me hoody and shorts and trainers! youd be like, yep he's a little tosser! but i do actually have a brain in this massive head, and i hope people give me a chance and listen to the crap i talk, because i might end up meeting someone who loves it and ill be happy as larry with that!

also being a footy fan i would just like to mention poor Fabrice Muamba tonight, for those who dont know, he collapsed and stopped breathing on the pitch tonight, very shocking and very scary, this puts things into perspective! but football, as a community and passionate sport shone through tonight with hundreds of applauds, blessing and get well tweets....so get well soon Fabrice!

And one last thing, while im mentioning the unfortunate subject of illness and health! ive got a mate called Marc Langford, whose also just started blogging (chefmarco)...he is currently in the drafting stage of writing a cook book for those on dialysis (kidney failure) because its hard finding tasty meals and having variety on a strict low sodium diet! so keep your eyes peeled and let people know! and bless the little shit he never moans! i think id make sure everyone knew and i got to the front of ques, and parked in disabled spaces, but then again im an arse!

and one last mention is me little mate Tasha! (so on trend) shes a little legend, she's got some greats blogs and she's prob what Mr.Men based Mr.Nice on, she is proper lovely i swear, she's basically a nun...but with a boyfriend!

so yee follow me you legends and listen to my shite, im bascially just goin to do a diary of my everday life!!!